Monday, September 28, 2009

dont know....

dont know why i think abt u..
dont know why u can make me smile
dont know why i feel like i feel
dont know why i remember u wen i am happy
dont know why i remember wen u sad
dont know why i wanna share everything with u
dont know why i feel i have a right on u
dont know why i see u in my dreams
dont know why the i wish the dreams i saw came true
dont know why u cant feel the same
dont know why i cant be ur stressbuster
dont know why i cant make u smile
dont know why i cant talk wit u
dont know why i worry
dont know why am afraid of u
dont know if being away is fine
dont know if not talking helps
dont know how much distance is fine
dont know if its good to be jealous
dont know if its good to express my mind
dont know if its good to care
dont know what creates the distances
dont know what erases the distance
dont know what am going to do tomorrow
dont know whats good for health
dont know what makes me ME
dont know why i am writing this!!!!!!

lol....heard the song dont know why i love u....n i thought lemme many "dont knows" can i come up with....not a bad try i think :) :)

song of the day:

Thursday, September 24, 2009

vicky cristina barcelona

i saw this movie soemtime back. ideally i should be writing this post in the movie review...but i am writing this here because i have more to say abt the theme of the movie rather than the movie itself!!!!

i didnt like this movie as a movie!!!!! what i want to say it is, it was not entertaining in anyway nor we feel that the movie makes a lot of sense while watching it...and neither can we gather where is it leading to...and if u dont give the movie a second thought u ll jus forget u ever saw it....
many of u might want to watch the movie for Penelope Cruz (she got an oscar for this one)...

well as the story goes, vicki and christina are childhood friends...they are best friends and love and care for each other a lot...but besides their friendship they have nothing in common...
vicky (rebecca hall) is a grounded, practical girl who is stable, happy in the life she has chosen (meaning the job she does and with regards to the fiance (doug) she has chosen), cristina (scarlett johannson) is more of risk taker and believing in everlasting romantic love types....and she feels she has shd explore her artistic talent (she has made a 12 min movie abt love!!!!!!)

so now vicky is invited by a relative (or friend) to visit barcelona n stay with them for the summer....n she takes along cristina too...this is a good break from routine for both these girls who are looking forward to spending a quite summer....

the summer gets interesting when the girls meet juan antonio (javier bardem) who is an artist who has been in limelight in the art world for his nasty divorce with maria elena (penelope cruz) at an art gallery.It so happens that juan is in the same restaurant as vicky and cristina for dinner later in evening and he walks up to them and invites both of them for a weekend of sightseeing, wine and making love to oviedo....

cristina who is getting out of an old relationship agrees easily and overrides vicki's words of caution and pulls her along with her to oviedo....there cristina falls ill and so vicki is left to do sightseeing with juan....after an initial coldness she gets to see juan and develops liking for him...and at the end of the evening, she makes love with him and after that she feels she missed something in life till now, which she never realized and that juan is her love not her doug!!!but of course vicky being vicky that she cant leave doug and she does not even get a chance to speak anything with juan the next day as they return to barcelona....

cristina has no idea what went on between juan and vicky, and she agrees to meet juan wen he asks her out after returning to barcelona....slowly they both like each other a lot and she moves with into his house with him...she enjoys being with juan, his art circle friends and she feels she has found what she was looking for, her love, her way of expressing her artistic side, her freedom etc etc...around this time vicky remains out of touch with juan never even telling him how she feels for him until they meet accidently at library and he tells her she never sought her after returning to barcelona coz he thought she might not want him and that he was not her type of guy and coz she was engaged...and he also tells her that now after getting to knwo cristina he really likes now vicky keeps her mouth shut abt her feelings...

problem brews for cristina and juan when maria elena, juan;s psychotic ex wife tries to commit suicide and juan has to get her home and take care of her as she has no one to take care of her in the world....christina is very supportive and does not mind it...slowly as she gets to know maria elena she finds out that she is in fact quite a nice person and they become good friends....and so much so that she does not mind intimacy growing between juan and maria elena as well...and as maria elena says "juan and i love each other a lot.....but there is something missing in the relationship that keeps them apart" (something to this effect) and that something is fulfilled by cristina so as long as cristina is with them they dont fight and all 3 develop a mutually satisfying relationship....

this is jus half the movie story.......and i dont wanna spoil it for u by telling the second half....well what interested me was the end!!!!!! which had a lot of ideas we cud take home with us if we thought enuf....the movie ends with vicky getting married to doug, cristina returning to usa with vicky and juan and maria elena fighting and going apart once again....basically they all return to where it began!!!!!! square one...with vicky feeling it was practical not to be too demanding of life and to accept things that naturally comes ur way.,....cristina not knowing what she exactly wanted out of life...and juan and maria elena not developing a mutually satisfying relationship....

what i take home is, if u want to make any change in ur life, you gotta be the one making vicky thinks getting juan into her life is gonna change it (make it more interesting and adventurous!!!!), juan and maria think cristina can make their relationship better....and cristina thinks being with juan and in spain where she has her freedom etc etc can make her life better, where she can express herself...

but as they all find out, thats not the case...other person or situation cannot change ur life..these are all extrinsic factors...unless u take it up to urself to change ur attitude in life and towards life, things are not gonna be any different even if u r in a situation u think is best for u!!! coz in sometime the questions are going to return.....what am i doing....something is missing....why do i u feel trapped....and makes u wonder why is ur life the way it is...why cant it be other way round....and again u ll pack ur bags and look for some new adventure!!!!!!

So let us not waste time in asking these questions....let us not wait for someone else to change our life for us....introspect...let us know our own weakness...try and rectify it....let us know where we need to change our point of view...sometimes is better to accept things, and sometimes its better to fight for what we let us keep our discrimination power with us...let us try to make the best of the situation we are in...dont be afraid to speak our mind, express ourselves...dont be afraid to take risk....just take our life in our in charge of the situation...and most of all keep the key of happiness in our hands!!!!!

song of the day

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

once again...its greys anatomy time :) :)

today rushika and i started watching the the greys anatomy season 1 episode 1 again......well enjoyed it even though i have seen the entire series twice already....n i owe it big time to aniket for making the cds for times when the days seem long...wen i have nothing to do...and when no one is around, these cds sure get me thru :) :) :)

well well...i think i wud love to write the review for each episode...lemme start with the first one and lets see how i follow it up or not!!!!!!!!!

so now as the first episode goes...the interns get introduced to each other and dr bailey!!!!! (love her 5 rules)
meredith realizes that her one night stand derek, is actually her boss and that she is not gonna get rid of him easily....
cristina and meredith begin their acquantaince with sharing secret, bugging each other, and then sorting it out!!!! wow an awful lot to happen within first 48 hours of meeting each other.....
george has managed to rub dr burke the wrong way.....almost killed a patient and earned the title of 007 (licensed to kill) which is gonna stick to him forever now......
meredith and george have begun to face what its like to become a surgeon...saving a life...telling the family that their loved one didnt make it etc etc...
and we learn that, meredith mom the great ellis grey, has alzeimer's disease which has advanced quite a bit.....

my favourite dialogues are :
burke to george "you never promise a family member a good result, the only one who can do that is GOD and i have not seen him hold a scalpel lately".

meredith to derek "that was wonderful, you cut cadavers.....but u dont know whats its like to do such a procedure.....its such a high!!!!! i dont know why people do drugs" (these are not the exact wordings but i guess u got the meaning)

song of the day :

Monday, September 21, 2009

As I've Matured...

As I've Matured...
I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.

I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and
all the less important ones just never go away.

And the real pains in the ass are permanent.

I've learned that we are responsible for what we do,

unless we are celebrities.

I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working

in your house, one of your kids did it

I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.

I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural


I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just


I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.

I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.

I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others -

they are more screwed up than you think.

I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is

stalk them and hope they panic and give in...

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

this beautiful forward made me smile.....simple words with deep meanings...n some funny too...
loved it...its not my brain child!!!!!!!!!! dont think i cud write something so profound so simply....

Sunday, September 20, 2009

musings of a tired mind.......

sometimes i wonder why dont we fall in love with a photograph.....
photograph is so soothing to the eye....
so pleasant on the eye..
our days get brightened and clouds of despair shy away
makes us smile wen we are depressed
we can talk with it for hours and it wud jus listen,
we cud hold out our heart and it wud not reject,
jus keeps on if it can see u too
as if it understands what we are saying

why is man so complex
turns simplest of situation into a nightmare
always runnnign after whats not to be found
and dont value what we have got,
why are we like the musk dear, running all around for the musk
not realizing that the fragrance comes from within

why dont we value what we have got,
whats the difference between the animals and us!!!!!
does elephant realize the value of ivory,
do the sheep know the value of the wool,
have the bees ever tasted honey???

we wander for love and peace and happiness....
but we fail to recognise it even when handed on the platter,
no wonder we are the smartest creatures on the planet..
we plan, plan and plan some more...
after all thats all we can ever do!!!!!!!
try and plan for an imaginary wonderful tomorrow
and hope that tomorrow comes soon enough.....

jus dont knwo what went thru me now!!!!!!!!but m feelign good after this :) :)

Friday, September 18, 2009

distant dream...

its nice to hear ur voice,
feels good to hear u laugh,
its difficult not being able to hold ur hand.....
its very difficult when i cant reach out to u...
never imagined life could be so cruel....
but if u promise u there at the end of tunnel..
i can walk thru the storm n face the thunder to come to u..
i dont mind the silence,
i dont mind the distance,
if i know at the end of the road u waiting for me.....
the road seems unsurmountable
very steep and high,
m afraid to look down,
feel dizzy of the heights,
i know u there not to catch me now, or to hold me now
but is the hope there,
that someday u ll stand by me if we make it thru...
its tough wading thru the ocean,
the tides are against us,
nothing seems right except the tiny flicker of light at the end...
i want to believe in rainbows,
and i want to find my pot of gold..
it seems like a mirage though
like a distant dream..
waiting for the sun to come up,
and waiting for the snow to melt,
so that the earth can nourish the seed,
and the help the leaves to uncurl....

came up with this poem after reading a forward!!!!!!!!
its not a peom actually, coz none of the words rhyme..LOL....
and i was never into writing poems or songs...
jus giving it a shot!!!!!!!!